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Leila had come back to the outside world and was suffering from intense heart ache because her ex boyfriend, Mat, was attempting to move on within a month of her ending it. She had had good reasons to end it with him. Her heart didn’t agree but she had been doubtful about whether or not to continue with it for a while and she decided that she’d have peace if she decided to end it because looking at it rationally, she was 90% convinced that in the long run it wouldn’t work. It wasn’t fair to lead him on and not be able to make a stronger commitment when he asked. They were from two different worlds and had very little in common.
When Mat told her that he was going on his first date with Nicole she felt pain like she had never expected. She had grossly underestimated love. Now here she was again in the same place she first traveled to in her explorations of the outside world. In the same place she and Mat had spent many wonderful days and nights. Everywhere she looked she was reminded of old times.
The group of friends who had met to welcome her back also decided to go for a concert the next day. But on that day, the others made excuses and left Mat and Leila alone to go for it. It was surely not intentional she thought. It couldn’t be considering everyone knew that it was over.
She met him outside like they had on their first date and it surprised her how things had come a full circle. They felt awkward just like on their first date. They didn’t hold hands like they felt was so natural to do. They entertained themselves for the time until it started. They took secluded seats in the corner.
When the show began, Leila controlled her impulse to hold him hand. But sitting next to him, his smell filling her senses and having him so nearby, she finally gave in and held his hand. He was apprehensive at first and said that he shouldn’t. But soon gave in. She leaned on his shoulder and watched sideways. Soon he put a possessive arm around her shoulder and she felt like she was back where she belonged. It wasn’t long before his fingers were at her mouth. She kissed them and soon took his thumb into her mouth. He let out a pleasured sigh. It was clearly turning him on. And he drew it in and out of her bostancı escort bayan mouth as though it was his manliness inside her tunnel. This was a bit much for public displays of affection in her books but no one was watching and it was turning her on to no end. He switched fingers to his index finger and it went further down her mouth. She withdrew to kiss him on the cheek and whisper in his ear that she loved him. Because lustful as she was feeling, she felt more love for him than she had before. It was his turn to withdraw. He informed her that the previous date he had had with Nicole he had kissed her. She felt her blood grow heavy but in another 10 minutes she recovered enough to be able to touch him again.
It didn’t seem to matter. She loved him and that’s all she knew.
Their secretive exchanges were not discussed when they left the halls. Leila asked where they would now go. Mat replied that they would to their respective apartments. She asked what about their massage session? The last one for old times sake. He replied unintelligibly and she presumed he wasn’t going to come. Halfway to her house she got the feeling he was walking her home. Their subject of conversation drifted from impersonal to the reasons for why it ended. She didn’t like to think it was her who ended it. She felt so different now.
When they reached her place, she asked him if he’d like some water. The sexual tension was so high that sparks of electricity flew every time he stepped closer to her. She mentioned it and he said that then he should leave. And he should’ve but she didn’t let him. He told her he may start to love Nicole and this wasn’t going to be fair to her. Leila understood but couldn’t process it.
‘So, let’s go to bed?’ asked Mat.
Leila froze to the spot and then asked ‘Together or separately?’
‘I meant for the massage’
Mat had never had a massage despite previous lovers. This was part of the normal culture Leila was raised in. Massages weren’t sexual. They were necessary after carrying loads in the mountains or after a hard days work.
He took off his shirt and she had to control herself again from her lustful feelings.
He lay down and she settled ümraniye escort herself on top of him and began. She couldn’t resist attacking his neck with ferocious kisses before he muffled a warning about where that might take them. Self control was so difficult!
He turned over for the front side and involuntarily thrust upward. They were in one of their positions. He apologised and asked if he could massage her in return. She accepted. She was wearing a spaghetti strap low neck excessively short dress with jeans underneath. She had foregone her bra because the dress had enough support. She lay on her stomach and he sat behind her and started. The pressure of his fingers felt good. She found that wearing even a thinly strapped dress was getting in the way of a proper massage so she took it off.
He asked to do her front. She hesitated and then asked for the lights to be turned off. He obliged.
She turned over with her top covering her breasts. ‘Take it off’. She did. He was holding on to dear morals as he continued. ‘You are so beautiful even in the dark’ he allowed himself to say. After some point, he said in a thick voice ‘I can’t go on, Ley’.
She merely rose and took him into her arms. They sat there entwined, breathing hard with arousal and self control. ‘I think if we had any less on than we do now we don’t stand a chance’ he said. She nodded wordlessly.
She invited him to lay beside her and rested her head on his chest. But in a few moments passion pushed again and she found herself on him, grinding on top of him and finding her lips move to his.
‘Why won’t you?’
‘Because then I’d be doing something’
This didn’t make sense to her. ‘What if you just let me kiss you? And not kiss me back? Would that be fair?’
‘You’re making this hard aren’t you?’
She smiled at the pun. ‘Are you safe?’ he asked.
‘You shouldn’t’ve asked. I just finished my period and I’m sterile’
She knew how much he loved exploding inside her and she had planned not to tell him in case he was further tempted. But he had asked.
In renewed lust he asked ‘Do you want me inside you?’
‘Do you escort kartal want me to come inside you?’
‘Let’s do this’ he declared and rose her off him to take his jeans off.
She removed her lower clothing too and returned to position.
He entered her easily with less effort than ever before because she was so wet for him and he had excess lubrication with pre-ejaculation fluid too.
Their love-making was furious, fast, passionate. She said she loved him. He paused and asked her not to say so. But he now kissed back with a burning passion so intense like she had never seen before. It was so much more lust than love but it felt great. They switched to him on top and he came close to his climax but she warned him not to make a mess so she got off the bed and he took her from behind. She had never climaxed during sex before but she suddenly felt very close to it.
They switched again to him on top and he finished inside her. They lay there panting, his organ still inside as she repeatedly clenched around him extending his dramatic finish.
But as they cleaned up, a dark dusty blank mood filled the mood. She could tell he wasn’t happy about his actions. She had assumed he would take it with the same coolness as David had. But Mat was far more morally bound. He wasn’t raised to question some basic rules. And he had just broken one.
She had made love with the man she loved. He had fucked his ex and betrayed the trust of the woman he was trying to see.
She only felt bad because he felt bad. How could something that had brought them so much pleasure before suddenly feel so bad? It indeed wasn’t the same. They weren’t basking in the afterglow like they usually would in close cuddles and kisses and declarations of love. He was dressing quickly and she put on enough to see him out. He was angry with himself. He blamed himself. But she knew she was guilty for what he had done. How can you blame a man for making love to the woman he still loved inside when she lay there topless and hopelessly aroused by him?
They talked after he left. Swore never to speak of it to anyone. She held the guilt for several days after. He still holds it.
But it had brought them some sort of closure. Some kind of end to the sexual tension. He now swore to be even more true to Nicole now that he had ‘slipped’. Leila agreed for his sake.
In retrospect though, neither of them were sure what it really meant. It had been a mistake.
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